After we had washed the deep, neat cut and wrapped the band aid round it and Eldest was satisfied that there was no longer any chance that I might faint he said, ‘So, Mum, how did you do it?’

‘The lid of the can,’ I said.

‘Oh.’ His shoulders relaxed. ‘Thank goodness.’


‘I thought you did it with a knife, and every night when you start the tea I was going to have to worry that you have forgotten how to use a knife.’

And then he went through the list of people he can call in an emergency and made sure he knew where to find their phone numbers. If the mister’s in Oman.