If you are my facebook friend, you already know that yesterday, I got another assignment back, this one with the comment, ‘Language use is to (sic) colloquial. Use the thesaurus to help.’

Now, look, that’s a simple typo such as I might (and do) make all the time, but it’s stuff like that which is straining my friendship with this undergraduate study. I mean really. What kind of comment is that?

I shouldn’t let it worry me, because my grades are fine and really, what does it matter? I’ve got what I need to get out of the assignment, so just move on.

Do you know what I think it is that is really annoying me? All of this is my own fault. They’re treating me like a baby because when I was a real undergraduate I acted like a baby. I slept through morning lectures, I withdrew from subjects when I knew I couldn’t pass them, I read through textbooks the night before exams hoping that something, anything would stick in. I wasted the excellent educational opportunity that was given to me (indeed, ‘given’ – I am so old that I know who John Dawkins is, and if I had not taken an extra year to finish my degree I would not have paid more than $250 for it which, by dint of the effort I put in is its current approximate value to me. Others, like the mister, have profited a great deal more from their $250).

I made up for it later on. I studied really, really, extraordinarily hard for my postgrad qualifications. I read far beyond the reading list, I handed everything in on time, and when my lecturers gave me advice I listened. So I thought maybe I’d cancelled all that bad undergraduate behaviour out. But I think not. I think I’m paying for it now.

Serves me right.

Though that doesn’t change the fact that ‘use the thesaurus’ is bad advice.