From the Green and Gold Cookery Book, forty fourth edition, 378,000 copies sold

Fritz sausage

One and a half pounds of chuck steak, 1/4 lb. bacon, 1 1/2 cups (large) of bread crumbs, one teaspoonful of salt, one small teaspoonful of pepper, one dessertspoonful of Worcester sauce, pinch of thyme and one egg.

Mince the steak and bacon very finely, add bread crumbs and the well-beaten egg; mix well together; make into a roll and tie in a floured cloth. Put into boiling water and boil 1 1/4 hours. Turn out and roll in bread crumbs and serve cold.

– Edith F. Rutt

‘So,’ the mister asked, ‘if fritz really doesn’t have pig p*n*s, does that mean a snot block isn’t made of snot?’